Where’s Waldo?

A Little Bit Later On by Luke Bryan can get you started as I tell you about my most recent McDonald’s experience.


I honestly have gone to McDonald’s too much in the past few weeks. It’s just so easy for me to get food when I’m at work because it’s a 2 minute walk away. So lately, I’ve had a lot of burgers and fries.

It’s so unhealthy for me but I can’t help it. Anyway today was the second weirdest McDonald’s trip I’ve been part of.

Tonight my friend needed to move his truck from his parking lot to one closer to the dorm. I offered to drive him to it and me him and our other friend came along. We decided about halfway to my car that we wanted McDonald’s. After discussing it the rest of the walk to my car we saw it.

My car, covered in a foot or more of snow. I parked under a tree and the storm packed it all on my car, and so did the tree. I had too much snow on top of my car as well as around it; I’ll need a shovel tomorrow morning.

We turned on our heels and headed toward a bus stop to get the truck and eat some food.

The last time I went to McDonald’s with these two was the strangest experience.

Last year, around the same time of year, our hall went to Boston for a Celtics game. My friend and I were the only two guys going and our other two friends were already in Boston because they live there and were home for the weekend. So we met them at a McDonald’s in Boston and it was a regular old McDonald’s stay.

And then it happened.

Me and one of our friends we met up with were facing the doors and we were just minding our own, eating and such. The door opened and a grimy homeless person came in. He surveyed the place, growled, looked at my friend and I, growled again and left the building.

I honestly had no idea what just happened, luckily I didn’t get jumped while we were in Boston by that hobo.

That was the number one strangest McDonald’s trip.

Tonight’s will forever be up there.

So after jamming out to the song of the post, we parked and strolled up to a nearly empty fast food joint. There were two girls, an odd lovebird couple that was very clingy and young; then us.

We wait our turn and order as per usual. Then this “lurker” (as my friend described him accurately) comes into the establishment; he posts up at the counter and just kinda waits there. He is in high school, judging by his basketball jacket. Then the male lovebird comes up to the counter and complains about the burger being wrong and puts it on the counter.

The lurker goes over to it and observes it as if to see if he could commandeer the lost burger. He sets it down and resumes his post, lurking. Then the cashier calls the male lovebird’s name to get his corrected burger. The kid doesn’t notice. The lurker then looks at the new burger and brings it to the lovers’ table.

All of a sudden there are 3 new kids, all about our age, and they are high as all hell. They were cracking up and studying the dollar menu very very carefully. My two friends and I look at each other thinking “what is going on?”

We are still waiting for out food when the lurker moves from his post, and proceeds behind the counter. Wearing his boots and basketball clothes on. He bee lines it for the frialator and starts making the fries, moves from there to the computer to see what orders there are.

He either works there or is one friendly lurking fellow.

I get my food and sit down. The three randos are still contemplating the dollar menu. Then three more come into McDonald’s, they know the first set. All of a sudden there are about 12 of them while my two friends haven’t gotten their food yet. By the time my friends sit down there are maybe 18 of these random kids.

“Oh Jesus Christ,” my friend says. I follow his gaze, the two young lovebirds are midst make out.

We just stare down at our food and start shoveling it down. The lovebirds leave and I notice the girl was the one who drove. Yikes. Talk about revocation of that kid’s mancard….

As we are finishing the group of guys has gotten to about 20 at this point, and are still looking through the menu. We are stunned, we’ve been there for 25 minutes and so have they; just studying the menu.

We start to get up when one of them asks for 2 cents. They are trying to buy everything they can for 20 dollars. Apparently they went over.

We left and see around 6 or 7 more guys heading into the McDonald’s. If we had been but 2 minutes later it would’ve been the longest McDonald’s trip ever.


+ That’s Mickey D’s for you.



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